⌗WEP-IWSG Challenge, August 2020, Wednesday 19th, LONG SHADOW, The Banker


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Quote of the Day : 

L’humanité qui devrait avoir 6000 ans d’expérience, retombe en enfance à chaque génération.  Tristan Bernard (French playwright and novelist, 1866-1947)

Man who should have accumulated 6000 years of experience, falls back into childhood at every new generation.

It’s time for another Write Edit Publish Challenge of 2020, writing on a word and picture prompt with the Insecure Writers’ Support Group.

If you’d like to know more about WEP and IWSG,  or join the Challenge go here and here

IWSG in the 100 best blogging sites

The WEP site

The joint WEP-IWSG Challenge 2020

This Month

LONG SHADOW

The Banker

His long coat swishes across the macadam.

The gaslit streetlights throw the shadow

of a Stetson onto the lovers’ bench.

They gaze up and see the deep scar;

it forms a curve, a coma, like a tear

frozen at the corner of his eye.

His iris is contracted as if from an intense

glare. She gasps in surprise.

They scuttle off towards the cover of the trees;

he swooshes on his way, disappears

round a brick corner. A cat shrieks

from a trash can in a dead end.

whore whistles a walk down the alley

and smiles absently at the tall, bizarre hat

and cloaked passerby. She recoils

on glimpsing his face.

The man approaches the unlit bank;

he leans against the stone wall

and lights a cigar, pulling

his watch from his pocket. He waits.

When Mr Hacklebaum locks the side-door,

the mysterious stranger steps closer.

As they brush shoulders, the man

swipes a blade across the banker’s throat.

The moon grins at the scene,

casts long shadows over the pavement,

the bench, the wood. The murderer

slinks into the night, coat flapping.

©susanbauryrouchard

FCA 185 words.

The Third Man, Joseph Cotten, Orson Welles, by Carol Reed 1949   , watch here

Counterpart, TV series, 2017-19, watch here

Bole 2 Harlem, 2007 listen here

Elementary, TV series. Season 7, Episode 13,  2019, watch here

My travels this Summer

Dordogne , sunset on the meadow.

Basque Country, Hendaye. Sunrise on the Twin Rocks and the ocean

Sunrise over Leiketio, Biskaïa

Sunset over Leiketio

Sunrise over the Pyrenees, St Etienne de Baïgorry

Sunset over Les Aldudes, Pyrenees

Sunrise over the Cirque de Gavarnie, Pyrenees

Sunrise over village of Viscos, Grave de Gavarnie valley

Thats all folks. Heat wave again in Toulouse, France.

43 thoughts on “⌗WEP-IWSG Challenge, August 2020, Wednesday 19th, LONG SHADOW, The Banker

  1. Hi,
    I like your description of the murderer. His facial descriptions tell me that he has been through something horrible. He kills but it is a revenge killing because he passes by the lovers on the park bench and the prostitute. This made me wonder what pain the banker had caused him. It must have been deep pain for this man’s murderous desire.
    Shalom aleichem,
    Pat Garcia

    Liked by 1 person

  2. An interesting take on the chosen theme for this month’s WEP contest. Yet, I must admit to being curious about what provoked the stranger to kill the banker. Was it personal, or just an ill-fated toss of destiny’s dice? Or was it a fitting example of being in the wrong place at the wrong time? Well done.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. You did a great job of describing the murdered in a menacing way. I knew he was up to no good, and I was on the edge of my seat waiting to see what he would do. Great job on creating a creepy atmosphere!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Hi Susan. Loved this. From the beginning you transported me to American’s Deep South during the Great Depression.

    ‘His long coat swishes across the macadam/The gaslit streetlights throw the shadow.’

    Who knows if I’m way off, but I like my interpretation. I can imagine willow trees and antebellum mansions and a banker foreclosing on a loan getting what the murderer thought he deserved. Grim. Delicious. Bloody.

    I love your travel pics. Who knows how long before we travel again? I know many countries are allowing travel, but Australia is very cautious and tell us not to expect overseas travel for some time. I’m ever thankful that I travelled to Italy and France at the end of 2019. Just in time. Yay!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Denise for your detailed commentary. Was thinking more 19th century Prague …. but more to come in October and December, still haven’t decided on location and twists …. The feedback has pointed me into very different directions, so now I just have to pick and choose … or not , ha, ha.
      Happy WEP week. Thanks for your hard work on the WEP team.

      Like

  5. Murder in the form of poetry totally works. I like the build-up and the descriptions. Wonder if the banker is the cause of the murder’s disfigurement (perhaps he’s not disfigured, but that’s what I got.) Chilling and suspenseful. Nicely done.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. The description is evocative, though it’s interesting how people have different ideas of the location. My perception was misplaced (US) cowboy in a large city–New York perhaps. Glad to hear that there’s more to come, as this is intriguing!

    Liked by 1 person

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